


The Birds

by smolalienbee



Series: Elijah Kamski's demons [8]
Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Related, Canon Universe, Character Study, Closure, Comfort/Angst, Crying, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Post-Canon, Sad, finally a follow up to New Jericho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-25 14:42:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16199630
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolalienbee/pseuds/smolalienbee
Summary: After certain events at new Jericho, Elijah Kamski disappears. There's just one person stubborn enough to try and get him out of the dark prison he locked himself in.(this is a direct follow up to "New Jericho")





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Yes! We're finally here, following up the whole mess that happened in New Jericho. I've been putting it off for long enough and now it's finally here. Not much else to add to this, hope you enjoy!

 

A few days passed since the whole incident at new Jericho.

Days of being locked up in his own house. Alone.

Silence.

It all kept being replayed in his head. The screaming, the pain in his cheek, the red flashing all around, like a warning, warning not to push further.

A warning he completely ignored.  
  
He couldn't sleep. Couldn't eat. It was driving him crazy. The house was just suffocating him, but he feared going out.

He felt like he was going to snap again. He had to keep his distance.

His phone buzzed far too often. Unanswered messages, calls he didn't pick up.

 

_Connor_

_Connor_

_Chloe_

_Connor_

_Lt Anderson_

_Chloe_

_Markus_

_Connor_

_Chloe_

_Connor_

_Connor_

 

The list went on.

He considered picking it up, sometimes. But what would he even say? He knew he wasn't okay. Connor wouldn't believe it if he said otherwise. No one would.

And that wasn't even the biggest issue. Whenever he looked at his phone, whenever he saw it ringing, he felt this lump in his throat. He couldn't say a word.

So he shook his head and ignored the calls.

Didn't turn off his phone. It was like some sort of a nightmare, hearing it going off so often.

But he let it buzz, almost like a punishment.

He had to find something to keep his hands, his mind occupied. Anything.

That was how he ended up on the floor, with giant bags under his eyes, his hair a mess, wearing just boxers and a t-shirt. Cables and parts surrounding him. Drowning in the mechanical units.

Didn't even hear the front door opening or the soft footsteps that followed. Didn't notice the gaze that lingered on his back before a quiet voice finally spoke up,

“What are you doing?”

Elijah physically jumped. The cables fell out of his hands, a small object hit the floor and rolled to the side. He spun around with just his upper body, eyes wide. Like a terrified animal.

Connor was silent as he leaned down to pick up the object. A tiny, android bird. He looked it over for a moment. Kamski was still staring at him, his shoulders slumping considerably as his brain made sense of the whole situation. He looked down, swallowed thickly around the lump in his throat as he gathered some of the cables.

“...birds?” Connor hummed, slowly approaching the man.

No reaction. Elijah was hunched over, already tinkering with another one of the small creatures.

He wasn't sure if he appreciated how carefully Connor approached him, or if that just made him even more frustrated. Angry at himself and his inability to handle emotion like a proper human being.

The android crouched down next to him, the unfinished bird still between his fingers.

A moment of silence passed as Connor just watched him work. But dabbling with such small elements was impossible in these conditions and it didn't take long before Elijah tossed the second bird to the ground, irritated. He ran a hand down his face, pulled it off when he felt Connor touch his shoulder. He pushed his hand away.

“You need to take a break.”

Elijah wanted to snarl, but he bit back any words that came to his mind. Took a second to try and think more clearly before he spoke. Finally, he opened his mouth.

“...I used to make these when I was young,” he muttered, his voice nearly a whisper, “when I wanted to... take a break from androids and Cyberlife and... just about everything. I- sat at Carl's house and made these.” With a shaky hand, he gestured towards the bird laying on the floor, a few steps away.

Connor shifted, reached out to pick it up as well. He lifted both of the birds up, held them in front of his own face.

“They're very pretty,” he said softly.

Elijah just nodded slowly, lifting his gaze to look at the birds.

“I... Carl really liked them, so I gave him a few. I don't know what happened to them after he...” he trailed off.

“...I think Markus has them now. I saw some birds a few times in Jericho.”

“I'm glad someone's taking care of them.”

Connor sat down on the ground, turning the birds in his hands before handing one of them to Elijah. The man slowly took it from him and placed it down in his own lap.

“...how are you doing?” Connor spoke up again.

Kamski shrugged in response. He was tinkering with the bird again, attempting to get it to work despite his obvious frustrations. The android sighed softly. They were both silent for a while, watching Elijah's fingers as he worked.

“Do we really have to have this talk?”

“I... think it's a better solution to the situation than just leaving it unspoken.”

“There's nothing to talk about.”

Elijah desperately wanted to avoid the whole issue.

The face of that android as he grabbed him by the collar.

His skin itched, his fingers tightened on the bird. Something boiling under the surface of his skin. All that anger and fear, once again carefully hidden under the surface.

An attempt at hiding the monster inside him.

The monster that he truly was.

He would've crushed the small bird in his own hands if not for certain gentle fingers touching his hand. He loosened his grip.

“I was there. We both know there's a lot to talk about,” Connor's voice was quiet, but firm. A soft reminder of the android's true strenght and capabilities.

“...what do you even want me to say?” Elijah huffed, “I know I messed up. I told you it was a bad idea for me to go there. But it is too late now and the least I can do is make sure not to go there again.”

“You were scared.”

Kamski snorted quietly.

“He was scared, too.”

“I'm not trying to find an excuse for either of you, Elijah. I'm just saying that you can't blame yourself so much for what happened. You can't... push everyone away. You have to get through this. We know what being alone does to you.”

Elijah shook his head quietly. He pushed Connor's hand off his and began working on the bird yet again

“...Markus was right.”

“About what?”

“About Carl,” He paused, moved some cables. “I- should've visited. Should've been there for him more.”

There was a soft clicking noise as he put parts together and then, finally, the bird buzzed and flew up. A very faint smile flashed on Elijah's face as he followed the animal with his gaze. A moment of silence.

“...do you want to go visit him now?”

He stared up at the bird. Visit Carl.

Visit his grave.

He had never thought much about it. It was ridiculous, wasn't it? Visiting dead people. People that couldn't see or hear him.

But maybe that was what he needed.

Closure.

He was a broken machine and needed to be reassembled.

Piece by piece, like a computer

Step by step.

A gentle hand on his shoulder.

Shutting down. Rebooting.

He nodded, slowly.

“Just... let me finish this other one. Carl... needs someone to watch over him.”

Connor squeezed his shoulder gently. Patiently waited.

Always so patient.

 

* * *

 

 

Elijah stared down at his own lap. He still looked like a mess, he was sure. But at least Connor forced him to put on fresh clothes, to tie up his hair. Said something about how Carl wouldn't want to see him in just his boxers. Reluctantly, he agreed.

And now he was sitting in the cab. Heading to the cemetery.

Where Carl was buried.

With every second, his body itched more. He wanted to run away. He didn't want to face this, any of this.

And they haven't even talked more about what he did, at Jericho. The entire time, Elijah waited for Connor to bring it up again. But he didn't.

He wasn't sure how to feel about it.

The birds sat in his lap. Turned off, unmoving.

He moved his fingers over them, slowly. They were rough around the edges, simple. He knew they could fall apart easily. But it was the best he could do, exhausted and with his hands trembling. At least they worked.

At least they'd be better at watching over Carl, better than Elijah ever was.

It never even hit him how much he fucked it up until he saw that painting in Markus' room. Until he heard what the android had to say and he realized just how much better he was for Carl.

_Machines are so superior to us._

He didn't even think of it when he said it, but it was certainly true. A machine, his own creation was much more caring than he was. How did it come to this? When did he became more machine-like than his own work?

He looked up when the car stopped. Could feel a hand touching his shoulder yet again, so gently.

He didn't say anything as he gathered birds into his arms and stepped out.

The wind was blowing. Clouds gathering in the sky. He wasn't sure what hour it was, but it was getting darker. It felt like a storm was coming. Appropriate, he thought.

He wanted to cry.

A hand was taking his and he didn't protest, he allowed Connor to pull him along. He was too tired to really think or argue.

His fingers slowly wrapped around the hand, loosely holding onto it as they moved. His legs felt weak. Like he was going to crumble at any second.

He avoided looking at the graves, at the names on them. Connor was leading the way and Elijah just glared at the birds in his arms, blindly following the android.

“Elijah?” They stopped, but he refused to look up. “We're here.”

Wind blew even harder.

He lifted his gaze.

_Carl Manfred_

Seeing the name encarved on the grave, it hit him. Carl was gone. Gone. He was not coming back.

Memories flashed in front of his eyes. How he sat in his living room, escaping from his own responsibilities. As a kid, as a teenager, as a young adult. Watching Carl paint. Helping him out. The laughter that surrounded the house. The first time they drank wine together. The walks they went on together. Crying on Carl's couch, falling asleep there. The day when Carl met Chloe, his encouraging words. The day he showed him Markus.

_I'm sure you two will take good care of each other, Carl._

It was the last time he saw Carl in person.

He felt tears running down his face. He couldn't breathe. He stepped forward, fell down to the ground, felt the dirt and the stones against his knees. He scrambled to turn the birds on, even as his vision got blurry.

Chirping; their wings moved.

“Carl- I'm sorry,” his voice broke.

He placed the birds down on the grave and they stepped around it before opening their wings all the way. Slowly, they flew up. Elijah trailed them with his gaze, tears running down his face at a steady pace.

He didn't even know when Connor joined him on the ground.

Didn't know when arms wrapped around him. When he returned the embrace.

He buried his face in his shoulder and cried into it. His fingers dug into Connor's back. Clinging onto him as much as possible.

He couldn't remember the last time he cried so hard.

The last time he held onto someone so tightly.

It was relieving.

One step closer to being reassembled.

_To being complete again._

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So as I mentioned in the previous chapter, this is just a short follow up, basically showing what kind of effect the whole situation with Elijah has on Connor. Next update will probably happen in a week, on Monday or Tuesday, since I'll be at a con during the weekend (there's gonna be plenty of shenanigans since I'll be Connor and I'll have my own Elijah and RK900, you can check out my ig if you wanna see those)

The door creaked as it was pushed open.

He heard the soft, familiar sound of paws against the carpet. The large ball of fluff greeted him cheerfully.

Connor didn't react immediately. Watched as Sumo ran around him in circles, his tail wagging.

The android sighed, leaning down to rub a hand over the dog's head.

“Connor?” A voice called out from another room. “You back already?”

He didn't respond. Slowly lowered himself to the ground, hugged Sumo a little closer. Saint Bernard didn't even try to pull away.

“Connor?”

Hank's brows furrowed as he walked out of the living room and saw the two sitting there.

“...what's the matter, kiddo?” His voice got gentler. “Something happened?”

The question made Connor think back to the sight of Elijah on the floor, dead tired and yet still focused on the birds. Seeing him break down at the graveyard. It was a lot to deal with, though he did his best to appear strong whenever he was with Elijah.

But as soon as he was back home...

“I don't know how to help him,” he muttered, voice muffled as buried his face into Sumo's fur.

Lieutenant sighed heavily.

“Well yeah, duh. Of course you don't. What did you say about him? He's complicated and has many personal issues? Almost like what you said about me. And I'd like to think I turned out okay, thanks to you.”

Connor stayed quiet, still cradling Sumo close. Hank waited, gave him some time before he stepped a little closer and nudged the dog to try and get him away.

“C'mon, now. The floor isn't the most comfortable place to talk. And you better not suffocate our dog.”

The android nodded slightly. He carefully got up, not looking Hank in the eye as he did so. He kicked off his shoes, silently shuffled past the man, straight towards the couch. The lieutenant's eyes trailed after him the entire time.

They were soon all settled, Connor, Hank and Sumo. The android had his knees pressed up to his chest and he still looked distressed, eyes trained on the floor.

“Gonna tell me what happened, or?”

He didn't respond immediately. He had to gather his thoughts, think back on everything that happened that day.

Eventually, he told Hank everything.

About the birds. About how they visited Carl's grave. And how easily Elijah broke down in front of it. How they sat there for a while as he had to calm the man down. And even then, there were tears in Kamski's eyes as they stood up.

He remembered how quiet it all was. The tears heavy and large, but so silent. The only words that were spoken at the cemetery was a single apology.

The clouds were dark, the wind strong, but there was no storm.

No sound of thunder.

And then, still in that complete silence, they went on a walk. They didn't even discuss it. Connor simply decided there was no way he was bringing Elijah home so soon. And Kamski didn't even question it, he just let Connor lead him.

It was a strange mix of trust and numbness.

They were both quiet, initially. Then, they talked. But only about trivial things. The birds they saw in the park. Connor's last case. Sumo. Anything that wasn't connected to Jericho.

It was Connor who eventually decided it was time to go home.

He had to drive back with Elijah. Had to make him food and make sure he actually ate it. Had to nearly force him to go to bed.

He was glad Kamski was so exhausted he passed out as soon as his head hit the pillow.

Telling Hank about it was so difficult. He felt like he did nothing, seeing Elijah.

Once he was finished, he fell silent. He picked at his sleeve, hunched over. Sumo rested his head on his thigh. Connor felt a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“You did everything you could, Con,” Hank murmured.

“But-”

“No buts, son. You got him out of the house. You talked to him. You gave him food. Got him to sleep. You really did a damn lot, okay?”

Connor glanced up at Hank, but he didn't seem convinced. Slowly, he caressed Sumo's back with his hand.

“You can't just make all of his problems go away,” Hank continued, squeezing his shoulder. “The best you can do for now is rest, got it?”

Connor scrunched up his face. He dropped his forehead to his knees and curled in on himself more.

Why was this so hard? He was struggling just from watching Elijah suffer.

Compassion was such a strange and difficult emotion.

He didn't know how to deal with it. Had to remain strong if he wanted to help Kamski, but his stress levels were soaring and he felt like he was at the verge of breaking. His systems overloaded, processors overheating.

“Connor,” Hank's voice was tender. “You should really get some sleep. Recharge.”

The android lifted his head hesitantly, LED blinking red. He didn't say anything, didn't get a chance to before he heard Sumo's whimper. The dog easily picked up on his emotions, stayed close to him in an attempt at comfort.

“Lay down with Sumo. He has some pretty damn good healing abilities.”

Hank reached out to ruffle Connor's hair, while the android brushed his fingers over the dog's head. Slowly, he nodded, a quiet agreement.

“Alright, good. I'll leave you two to it, okay?” Hank slowly stood up, still gazing at Connor. Worried.

As soon as the space on the couch was unoccupied, Connor laid down on his side, arms wrapping around Sumo. He pulled the dog a little closer, pressing his face into his soft fur. Anderson watched over them for a moment, as if making sure that Connor really did go into sleep mode. It didn't take long before the android's LED flashed a soft blue and that was the sign Hank was waiting for. He sighed, leaving Connor to rest there, hoping things would get better for him soon.

The situation was taking its toll on all of them, that much he knew for a fact.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick note, as some of you may have noticed, this is listed as having two chapters - there's a very short follow up that I wrote to this and I'll probably post it sometime next week (hopefully pretty soon cause it's short and not that important, just lil something I wanted to write regarding what happened in this chapter). Then we'll proceed with the updates as usual!


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